Posted in Children Youth and Family, discipline, parenting

Effective Discipline

“PARENTS have lost the art of effective discipline and raising responsible adults, experts have warned.”

Well, yes. We have a lot of signs that we have totally and completely lost the plot and we are being pushed to breaking point. The article refers to the behaviour of the Xavier students but schools just reflect society. We are dysfunctional and it is because we are not coherent and consistent in our expectations and we keep sending out mixed messages. On OECD standards we look like we cannot hold it together at all. Disclipline is not abuse and it is not nasty. No one should have to ask 10 times for something to be done. Bus passengers shouldn’t have to put up with loud, overbearing teenagers. But it is worse than that because we are experiencing some very violent and bratal teenage behaviour.  They are not attached and their anger levels are extreme. They are fighting, bullying and creating mayhem. Good people are doing good things but they are pushing against the tide of unruliness which comes from lack of socialisation. You don’t just abuse people. You don’t just go out and wreck things. You don’t just come and go to school as you please and then sit there and yak and blame everyone else when things go wrong. The social responsibility and common rules of etiquette are missing because children get away with a lot when they are little and then are directed into peer directed behaviour because we let go of the control. It didn’t used to be like that but I think Dr. Tucci in this article tends to direct us where we need to think. We need to let parents be in charge and we have to stop undermining them. We have to stop being so sanctimonious and then maybe our children will be happier and more productive. As it stands they are not getting anywhere except into trouble because they think they are the boss and it’s because we haven’t taken control as adults. Our society has broken down and the signs are there. It started when the rules were for everyone except me and then the smart mouthing and it  has just grown from there. Children need boundaries, they need love and they need to learn…and when it’s their turn they can be the boss!

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Author:

Retired Adelaide based professional. Lived here most of my life. I have been a teacher of French, English and German since 1974 and value the capacity of the classroom, wherever that might be, to write on the lives of others.

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